Lemme start with a few rants
WHITE PEOPLE
- You smell like my dirty socks, if I left them dirty and in the rain for 4 days. The ones that don't smell like dirty socks in the rain happen to smell like wet dog.
- You talk to yourself. Stop talking to yourself. That's what your brain is for. No one around you gives a shit if you still have to pick up milk on the way home.
- The Dunning-Kruger Effect is strong with these ones. You don't know shit about everything. "As a matter of fact...". As a matter of fact nothing, mayonnaise-looking motherfuckers...don't tell me about shit that goes on in the rest of the world when you've never left your city, let alone your province or state, or country.
- Internet memes about cats are fucking gay in real life.
- Your ability to pretend like you're offended for other groups of people is hilarious. Also, it's hilarious how white people want to profile darker skinned people, but are quick to be offended when you say something about gays.
- Also, there's only one "F-word", and it's not "Faggot"
- Speaking of fags, you white people love taking pictures of your balls on other guys' faces when they sleep. That shit ain't right.
- Next white person with a tan who hates brown people deserves to be imprisoned in a North Korean concentration camp.
- White people: the only people in the world who refuse to spend 30 seconds on microwaves dinners for their kids, but will spend an hour walking behind a mutt picking up shit in their hand.
ASIANS
- Stop shuffling your got-damned feet. Pick them up when you walk. God gave you muscles in your thighs for a reason. The last two weeks i've been studying at my local library, and I don't even have to look up to see if an Asian is walking. You're parents may force you to study and get straight A's, but they failed at the basics of parenting when you can't walk.
- Also, stop getting up from tables and just running across a room. That became dumb and annoying in the fifth grade.
- Your mothers should be karate-chopped in the uterus with hello kitty boxing gloves for raising you fools with so little social etiquette.
- You smell like soy sauce and vineger.
- Only people who would consider Starcraft release dates a National Holiday.
- Next time you guys decide to get behind the wheel of a car...don't. Call a cab.
- Also, you talk to close. If I speak English too clear or too fast for you to understand, getting up in my grill isn't going to magically make you understand better.
- Asian people: Only people you can't leave around your dog when they're hungry. Also, the only people who have mastered just about everything except how to drive and how to not be annoying as fuck.
BLACK PEOPLE
- Talk lower. I'll be damned if I've ever been in a quiet room where a black person didn't walk in and make more noise than necessary.
- There are people around you. Act like it. 500 years of slavery doesn't give you the right to act like a dick to everyone. Save those sentiments for the mayonnaise people.
- Next black person that thinks Muslims or brown-looking eastern people need to be "randomly" stopped and frisked extra at the airport deserves to get their car "randomly" stopped and getting frisked by the cops.
- You drive too slow. Black women are the slowest drivers. So damned slow.
- Also, don't get all proud of rap being black music that's popular among the masses, and then pissed off when someone who's not black recites lyrics with the word "nigga". You can't have it both ways...nigga.
- Black people: Only people in the world whose perceptions of who is beautiful have been increasing at the same rate as the obesity levels.
/rant
WHITE PEOPLE
- You smell like my dirty socks, if I left them dirty and in the rain for 4 days. The ones that don't smell like dirty socks in the rain happen to smell like wet dog.
- You talk to yourself. Stop talking to yourself. That's what your brain is for. No one around you gives a shit if you still have to pick up milk on the way home.
- The Dunning-Kruger Effect is strong with these ones. You don't know shit about everything. "As a matter of fact...". As a matter of fact nothing, mayonnaise-looking motherfuckers...don't tell me about shit that goes on in the rest of the world when you've never left your city, let alone your province or state, or country.
- Internet memes about cats are fucking gay in real life.
- Your ability to pretend like you're offended for other groups of people is hilarious. Also, it's hilarious how white people want to profile darker skinned people, but are quick to be offended when you say something about gays.
- Also, there's only one "F-word", and it's not "Faggot"
- Speaking of fags, you white people love taking pictures of your balls on other guys' faces when they sleep. That shit ain't right.
- Next white person with a tan who hates brown people deserves to be imprisoned in a North Korean concentration camp.
- White people: the only people in the world who refuse to spend 30 seconds on microwaves dinners for their kids, but will spend an hour walking behind a mutt picking up shit in their hand.
ASIANS
- Stop shuffling your got-damned feet. Pick them up when you walk. God gave you muscles in your thighs for a reason. The last two weeks i've been studying at my local library, and I don't even have to look up to see if an Asian is walking. You're parents may force you to study and get straight A's, but they failed at the basics of parenting when you can't walk.
- Also, stop getting up from tables and just running across a room. That became dumb and annoying in the fifth grade.
- Your mothers should be karate-chopped in the uterus with hello kitty boxing gloves for raising you fools with so little social etiquette.
- You smell like soy sauce and vineger.
- Only people who would consider Starcraft release dates a National Holiday.
- Next time you guys decide to get behind the wheel of a car...don't. Call a cab.
- Also, you talk to close. If I speak English too clear or too fast for you to understand, getting up in my grill isn't going to magically make you understand better.
- Asian people: Only people you can't leave around your dog when they're hungry. Also, the only people who have mastered just about everything except how to drive and how to not be annoying as fuck.
BLACK PEOPLE
- Talk lower. I'll be damned if I've ever been in a quiet room where a black person didn't walk in and make more noise than necessary.
- There are people around you. Act like it. 500 years of slavery doesn't give you the right to act like a dick to everyone. Save those sentiments for the mayonnaise people.
- Next black person that thinks Muslims or brown-looking eastern people need to be "randomly" stopped and frisked extra at the airport deserves to get their car "randomly" stopped and getting frisked by the cops.
- You drive too slow. Black women are the slowest drivers. So damned slow.
- Also, don't get all proud of rap being black music that's popular among the masses, and then pissed off when someone who's not black recites lyrics with the word "nigga". You can't have it both ways...nigga.
- Black people: Only people in the world whose perceptions of who is beautiful have been increasing at the same rate as the obesity levels.
/rant